Things that fully irk you


Pair of right idiots in the cinema on their phones in the row in front of us. Eventually got so distracting I asked the chap to knock it off. He called me a cunt and told me to Fuck off and they carried on. Irked.


Did you tell the usher?


The usher had an attempt a few minutes after mine. Just carried on.


Cant get the staff these days…


this probably isn’t a universal one but my boss is really starting to wind me up. She’s dentist and I’m nurse so we work dead close and every time my stomach rumbles she’s like HAHAHA WHAT AM I LIKE MUST BE DINNERTIME
they are my rumbles


It’s a one screen local cinema and I think the usher is the daughter of the chap who runs it. It’s a lovely cinema and really rare to have such utter idiots ruin films there.

That said I saw Dunkirk there a week or so ago and it was packed to the rafters with the blue rinse Brexit brigade many of whom talked the whole way through.

I hate other people.


He said yeah, yeah, YEAH YEAH, yeah yeah YEAH YEAAAAAH.


On the subject of cinema irkings:

There’s a big film festival on, been looking forward to it for ages.
Nearly every film has started late, many have people wandering in up to 20 minutes late. Highlights were fucking up Stalker, and one in a cramped old style cinema, so everyone needed to stand up to let them into their seats.

Fucking people, honestly.


Worth noting that the worst crowd was the retirees at the 4pm showing yesterday; all the punks at the documentary on a local band were fine.


I stopped going to the cinema because of ‘people’. The constant talking/phone use etc. It’s the kind of area where you get stabbed in the eye with an ice pick for looking at someone’s pint the wrong way in a pub. So asking people to STFU is out of the question.


Hell is other people


On a menu yesterday had a choice of


what’s the local beer? We dont have any. Whats the sardinian beer? Dunno. Whats the italian beer? Moretti. Guess i’ll have that then!


Worked at pub last night. Got trapped in the endless loop of
"what do you recommend?"
“what do you usually drink?”
“anything really”
“lager, ale, wine, spirits…”
“don’t mind”
“what were you planning on eating?”
“haven’t looked yet”
“nice light summery ale then?”
“nahhh… don’t like ale”



Should’ve offered them a creme de menthe


no matter how much you list stuff for sale for online, people always messaging you trying to get like £5 off. mate, it costs £300, what difference does a fiver make ffs


Nazis. Nazis fucking irk me.


selling on ebay is the worst


i remember one time when I worked in a pub and was the only person on the bar for a bit, lied to a few customers saying we’d got this fancy new lager in, but just poured people Stella Artois 4 from an unmarked tap.


If it’s less than an hour or so after the pub’s opened I will always ask which of the cask ales is the most popular today. That way, I figure, I won’t get a pint of beer that’s been sitting in the pipe overnight.


Direct reports taking the molehill sized task I’ve handed them and making a ruddy fucking huge mountain out of it between them.

Not getting involved, letting them sort it out between them, but Jeffing hell, it’s painful to watch.