Things you have been slow to realise


Just read this article?


Always thought the low quality swooshing sound on telephone hold music was a deliberate attempt at making people hang up rather than the result of reduced audio bandwidth


If you hit the pause/play button on my wireless headphones twice quickly, if it’s connected to your phone it redials the last number you called.

Guess who just direct dialled his GP while on the toilet.


were you wearing a shirt, though?


Yes but I had loosened my tie.


thank god, that could have been quite embarrassing otherwise!


I had this exact argument today!! Was waiting in line at a coffee shop with my friend and she said something about tenterhooks, so naturally I said “oh please behave, wtaf is a tenter you idiot? It’s obvs tender”


I went TO THE DEATH with the bf.
“it’s fucking tenderhooks you div!!”


I knew it was tenter but I never bothered to find out what it actually meant before… still not sure it makes sense (though neither does tender tbf)


I thought it was tenderhooks. I’m going to stick with it. I’ve got this far with it!


‘Tell you what, Graham, how about I sing this bit?’


I know they aren’t to be talked about but is Lost Prophets a pun on lost profits?



I’d never really dissected the phrase “scared the shit out of me” and just dismissed it as a way to emphasise how terrifying something is with a bit of swearing, but it’s saying something is so frightening it’s made feaces actually leave your body. Makes a lot of sense tbh


Wait till you get “pissed myself laughing”.


That’s the thing, “shat myself” is very self explanatory but for some reason I didn’t think about it like that with the other phrase.


Also Non-Prophets is a pun on non-profits. Took me years to get that (realised the prophet/profit thing but didn’t connect ‘non-profit’ and thought it was about how they weren’t profitable?).

And there is literally a skit on the album about this


Nah, I’m not going to put that definition on a pedal stall, will stick with tenderhooks


Don’t be such a damp squid, Jizz


I’m chomping at the bit to hear more!


Pedal stool*