Things you refuse to do anymore

Use a sieve or a colander for pasta. Will use the edge of the sink or tongs only*

*will make an exception for orzo

“the edge of the sink”

more info pls

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I have pan lids with strainers built into the sides.

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Just get my pan against the side of the sink and tip out. Takes some skill and training to keep all the pasta in the pan and the water in the sink but I’m pretty much there.

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Go to social events that I don’t actually want to go to.


Send greetings cards


I would like to see a picture of these. Do you need the lid on as that defeats the object for me.

Shuffle along the seats in cars.
Yes it’s nice you’ve opened the door for me but i’m not getting in and shuffling to the other side. Just NO.

it’s really no trouble to use a colander

Please don’t belittle my achievement.


Yes. You do need the lid to be on.‘the-pan’-aluminium-non-stick-saucepan-with-lid/p2447450

Talk us through the training.

Did they teach you here

‘The Pan’

plays montage

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Watch bleak films.


I don’t think I have been in the back seat of a car in three years. I don’t think I have been in anyone’s car other than mine and maybe once or twice a year my wife’s during that time either.

Still I applaud your stance.

Take any notice of my extended family’s activity on social media.


This is usually taxis only.

I think the Handmaid’s Tale is good. I have given up after a few episodes of season 2 - just can’t be doing with such relentless bleakness.