‘those are very stupid dogs. Look at the size of its head’ - my Dad said this every time he saw a whippet, and now I do too
‘that’ll do bloody rightly’ - a saying my grandfather passed to my dad that is passed to me, used when doing any DIY and you can’t be bothered to actually do it 100% right
when my dad leaves the house he’ll sort of rummage in his pockets and go ‘i’ve got that and that and that and that’ and now i do it too
‘Where you born in a barn?’
‘You make a better door than a window’
‘You’re shaped like a wooden man made of smoke’
‘Oh no John, no John, no John, nooo’ (sung) even though I’m not called John
Jesus wept!
Ah yes also ‘the house is lit up like the titanic’. I believe English people say ‘the house is lit up like the Blackpool illuminations’ which makes much more sense to be honest
“Anymore than a handful’s a waste”
–my maternal grandfather, on the subject of breasts.
It now comes to me in other contexts, unbidden.
Thanks, granddad.
When mixing any drinks my Dad would say:
“Better not make it too week because then it will be a fortnight.”
I find myself saying it too now which both annoys and delights me in equal measures.
Try really hard not to do this. No doubt one or two things have stuck though.
watch it now, here it comes, it’s the hotpoint high speed kettle
Not sure but I do say something that a disers mum introduced me to. When you’re switching from one wine to the other she’d pour a tiny drop of the new one into the glass and you drink that first to sort of clean the glass before filling it up.
Her relative also did it and they all called it a Petit Bernard after him and now I say and do it and she’s absolutely delighted as she basically wants it to go viral 
Not my parents but my Granny used to say things where “topping” a lot and I liked it. I would like to say this more but it does not come naturally. You need a really good northern accent to say it properly though. “Top-een” mine falls short.
“Cutting up rough” - it’s windy outside
“Glee heading” - happy
Oh I say vinegar trip rather than wild goose chase. That’s from my nan though.
use this quite a lot 
Another ex’s mum one. If someone said “well, well, well…” she’d say “…three holes in the ground” and I still mutter that silently to myself
“Fuck Switzerland”- my dad.
“Where are we going?”
“There and back to see how far it is”
When food is good I’ll say ‘very tasty Terry’ coz my dad does.
Leaves front door open for slightly longer than normal
Warming the postman up are we?