Think I may have constipation for the first time ever

Been sat here for five mins straining with no movement

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Do you actually need a poo?

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Take a bigger run up.

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Eat a pear

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When did you last go?

Come back to me when you haven’t been in a week and we’ll talk.

3 Likes

Been building for it all day, im at work obvs

Oof you win

I think you should try again at 16:30

Unfortunately, you’re getting one of these. Which one do you choose?

  • Constipation
  • Diarrhoea

0 voters

Can never not think of the David Firth cartoon where he equates it to having an unwanted visitor in your house who’ll run and hide under the stairs or pretend they’re going to leave then go up to your bedroom.

1 x pot of strong coffee + 1 x Benson & Hedges

Foolproof

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Work it out with a pencil.

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Have to wonder if anyone choosing diarrhea here has ever really had diarrhea. Like, really had diarrhea.

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I know right? Im very very surprised at this poll…

No shit?

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Yeah but then again I have being on some horrible laxative solutions to make me poo and that was also awful and SO draining.

i’d rather a release than a backlog.

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But with a backlog you can go about your day*. You don’t have to live in fear.

*in immense discomfort

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DO NOT STRAIN.

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Truth. Or you’ll give yourself a rotten case of the Rockfords.

1 Like