#82

Also trying to work out why Partick Thistle are in Maryhill for @Unlucky.

2 Likes
#83

“Alexa, why do people dance in the streets of Raith?”.

1 Like
#84

This one is beyond my ken.

#85

PLYMOUTH ARGYLE. This one goes out to my main man and food and drink soul mate @anon19035908

So. I’m not gonna pretend I know a huge amount about the football team, but I have been to Plymouth once and had a marvellous time. I got properly stoned for the first time on one of the beaches there, and also held a chicken. For that alone the team get at least one point.
Also, you and your supporters came to my hometown to play against us in 2016 when I was working in the pub closest to our pitch. The fans were an absolute dream to serve, had that charming seaside relaxed attitude and I adored them. It was my job to keep up to date with what matches were happening and when, but I fucked it up that week and didn’t get extra staff on to help. So out of nowhere I had about a hundred Plymouth fans pile into my tiny pub with just me on shift, and not one of them was arsey with me for being a bit slow. One of them even changed a barrel for me so I didn’t have to leave the bar.
Most of them came back after and were just total gems. Sweet, made friendly jokes, a few even bought me shots. Sweet and lovely and patient. To this day I’m glad you beat us, because I’d recently fellated one of our players and he was such a prick. So. Good.
I did have to fill a horn up with ale which was… weird, but no one’s perfect. And I doubly appreciated how nice they were because the week before I’d had Forrest Green smash up the gents for no reason other than that they’re arses so I was a bit on edge.
Also Paul Whitehouse seems fine and he’s a fan, right?
PLYM ARG. My third fav football team.

15 Likes
#86

not sure why I’m still surprised at the turns your tales take

4 Likes
#88

He was once, for an advert!

Still better than Swindon fans tbf but yeah they’re awful.

Sounds about right, pretty Devony thing to do.

Also I’m very happy with this, thank you.

1 Like
#89

:heart:

1 Like
#90

can’t believe plymouth are getting an easy ride here

2 Likes
#91

the team exeter could’ve been

2 Likes
#92

Why don’t you shut your big yap. We’re the best team Colin Wanker ever managed for a start.

4 Likes
#93

all the cool kids are into mick mccarthy these days anyway

#94

BARNSLEY. Barnsley Barnsley Barnsley.
Again, I don’t know a huge amount about your team but I do know about your supporters and I like 'em. My best mate’s long term partner is a Barnsley born and bred lad and a long term supporter and he’s great! I mean, weird as you like, but lovely. Instead of a herbal tea or a hot choc, he has a “bed time bovril” but you have to respect that. The man knows his roots.
I mean, yeah, you have to play against teams such as Derby but that’s hardly your fault. My only qualms are that your crest is way too fucking complicated (reign it in fellas, it has a real whiff of overcompensation) and also that you haven’t made the most of your stereotypes. I know they’re a bad thing usually, but in this case I just think you should put a pair of trainers on a kestrel and train it to hoof the ball into the net. You’re missing such an opportunity. Imagine the crowd chanting “KES KES KES.” It’d be stunning. Please pass my thoughts on.

OH. And if you were a song you’d be Love Will Find A Way by Loxley/Hawke. I can’t explain why, mainly that you have so much potential but you don’t utilise it. xx

6 Likes
#95

I remember when Cardiff played Bath City in a pre season friendly and about 8 of their fans tried to act out some kind of Welsh football factory scenario in my pub and everyone just laughed at them. Tells you all you need to know.

1 Like
#96

I had a good day

3 Likes
#97

everything about every football team is impermanent and in flux, supporting any one team over another is arbitrary and meaningless, and even if it weren’t the vicarious joy over their triumphs is at the expense of others sense of loss and therefore immoral. generally the teams with the most money will do better than those that don’t, and the few unexpected wins are just down to chance

1 Like
#98

THANKS FOR STOPPING BY!

2 Likes
#99

yeah but so’s everything we love, just attaching meaning to shadows innit

#100

@kermitwormit could you please compare Plymouth Argyle to a band or musician as per the other ones?

#101

Thanks @kermitwormit :heart_eyes: That’s a very touching analysis of Barnsley.

I confess I was hoping you’d be very mean about them, cos we absolutely hate them here :joy::joy::joy:

2 Likes
#102

some things are actually good imo