Thread to post lord of the rings quotes

Going through that thread to find it now.

You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it’s me, I’m a little fucked up maybe, but I’m funny how, I mean funny like I’m a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I’m here to fuckin’ amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?

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lol so dis auld dude was like have some ring but shhh don’t tell any1 like. yh woteva pedo. just cos u knew my uncle! @bagendbellend69

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Et tu, Frodo?

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paint me like one of your french orcs

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PEOPLE SAY THEY KNOW THEY CAN’T BELIEVE
MIDDLE EARTH THEY HAVE A BOBSLEIGH TEAM

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Picture the scene: The other fuckin’ week there, down the fuckin’ Volley with Gimli, playing pool. I’m playing like Paul-Fuckin’-Newman by the way. Givin’ the boy here the tannin’ of a lifetime. So it comes to the last shot, the deciding ball of the whole tournament. I’m on the black and he’s sittin’ in the corner looking all fuckin’ biscuit-arsed. When this hard Orc comes in. Obviously fuckin’ fancies himself, like. Starts staring at me. Lookin’ at me, right fuckin’ at me, as if to say, “Come ahead, square go.” You ken me, I’m not the type of cunt that goes looking for fuckin’ bother, like, but at the end of the day I’m the cunt with Narsil and he can get the fat end in his puss any time he fucking wanted like. So I squares up, casual like. What does the hard cunt do? Or the so-called hard cunt? Shites it. Puts down his malt beer, turns, and gets the fuck out of there. And after that, well, the game was mine.

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Frodo, you’re what the French call ‘les incompetents’.

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This is bullshit, Frodo. And you can forget about the two weeks in the Domain of the Dark Lord. Two words: mount. doom.

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You truly are the Lord of the Rings.

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Play it nice and cool, Bilbo, nice and cool

Gandalf falls through the bar, Bilbo makes a face

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Any luck?

Gandalf’s methods of betting weren’t scientific, but they worked. When he won, he collected. When he lost, he told the bookies to go fuck themselves. I mean, what were they going to do, muscle Gandalf? Gandalf was the muscle

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We’re gonna need a bigger ring.

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