In similar circumstances, when I was in about year 9, we were playing cricket out on the strip of tarmac behind the maths department. I was batting and made a sweet connection on my trademark well timed cut shot, with a full follow through over my left shoulder. a group of girls often came and sat down on the step adjacent to the “crease”. What I hadn’t noticed was that one of them had stood up and was just over the very same left shoulder as where my bat now was. The bat and her head made a very unwanted connection. I was obviously hugely apologetic. Thankfully she was little more than shaken, as the bat had almost come to a stop, but it did very little for our friendship. I’m not sure any of the group of girls spoke to me for quite a long time, despite a few more attempted apologies. Just so very glad I didn’t hit her any harder.
2 weeks ago I put a big pile of timber down too fast and it trapped my colleague’s hand and the nail is going to come off. She swore at me a lot in Russian but she was remarkably fine about it really. Apparently the nurse described it as ‘disgusting’. Then I saw a picture of it. It’s disgusting.
That would be an excellent colour on you tbf
Smashed my sisters face with a cereal bowl we were fighting over when she let go. She has a fake tooth. I smashed it literally the week her braces had been taken off.
Last month I was letting myself into my flat just as one of our upstairs neighbours was coming down the stairs. Next thing you know she’s missed her footing, gone over on her ankle and is absolutely screaming in pain saying she’s heard a bone snap. I went and got some cushions, put her in the recovery poisition, called an ambulance, got her flatmate from upstairs and waited with them for the ambulance to arrive (three hours!). Had a good chat, got a load of gossip from the rest of the block tbh. Anyway, the ambulance finally arrived so I got out the way.
Haven’t seen her since, but I bumped into her flatmate last week, and she said that the thing that made her miss her footing was the fact that I was wearing bright red trainers and they dazzled her and distracted her as she was coming down the stairs. So it sounds like it was definitely my fault.
You inconsiderate cunt!
If you did, I don’t remember it.
Which strikes me as a likely outcome of being backwards headbutted.
Slapped a woman on the arm when swimming the other day, she looked really offended. Think it was her fault cos I was staying in my lane and she was a bit over, but still felt awful about it.
Same! Except I haven’t been banned from dancing because I WILL NEVER STOP DANCING.
I smashed my own, full pint out of @Avery’,s hand at the Robyn gig on Friday as he was trying to hand it to me.
Also stepped/fell on a girls foot at the same gig and she was really Not Impressed and I still keep getting stabbing pains in my stomach thinking about it worrying that I was a nightmare and ruined her gig and everyone hates me
I mean we live in Brighton, it’s not like people wearing stupid clothes is a particularly rare occurrence
- Stood on my friend’s dog once, still feel bad about that every time I see a dog
- Trapped my nan’s fingers in a car door, still feel bad about that every time I see a car door, my nan, any other type of door, fingers or anyone else’s nan
- Jumped on my friend Charlotte’s back when we were teens to scare her, didn’t know my own weight and she happened to be standing with her hand against the wall in an awkward position and she ended up fucking up two tendons, still feel bad about that whenever I see her or hands
- Stood on a million people’s toes and sometimes hands (tbf, don’t be sitting down in the middle of a dense crowd) at gigs, sorry to all of those people
- Have possibly never had a sexual encounter without injuring myself or others
Group of us went to Planet Bounce for a birthday and we played trampoline dodgeball. Lined up a shot at a friend’s back, wound right back and let fly as hard as I could. As soon as it left my hand, my GF appeared out of nowhere and took the hit straight to the face. The look on her face after impact made my stomach feel like jelly in a washing machine.
oh yeah I once knocked my friend’s mum (Charlotte again, it was her dog too ffs, I’m so sorry Charlotte) right across the kitchen and onto her arse, she went flying. Sorry Pauline, sorry Dylan the dog (RIP).
Edit to confirm that I didn’t kill Dylan, he died of other causes a few years later
Broke my sisters arm when we were kids by pushing her over in a soft play area. She fell arkwardly and bent her arm backwards, so I guess having said that, you could argue that she broke her own armfeel terrible about it obvs
Let’s!! Be warned, my fave moves with friends are spinning them around and going under each others arms, old timey dancey style but fast
And I’m sure they could, I’m pretty annoying!
When we hadn’t been together very long, my now wife and I broke up for a while (My fault) and then bumped into each other at some club night and were chatting then had a dance and as I was trying some sort of move I accidentally threw her on the floor and she couldn’t get back up for ages but she thought it was hilarious and now we’re married. So dance your socks off @kermitwormit and @Gnometorious, good things can happen when you’re a clumsy dancer.
u hit @Jeremys_Iron in face?
Yeah I feel bad but I can’t stop laughing at this
Oh @Scunner you sweet, clumsy prince