Tiny interactions from your life that you still think about

He probably just didn’t want to see you eaten by a lion.

As you no doubt know you’re not supposed to get out of your vehicle in the park, except at specific places. I remember us sitting in our car at the edge of a large pool watching the (very dangerous) hippos splashing about near the (very dangerous and very well concealed) crocodiles. Two absolute gonks pulled up in their car, jumped out, ran to the water’s edge (near the crocodiles) took a load of pictures of the hippos then ran back to their car oblivious to the fact they’d just escaped with their lives.

To be honest thinking about your situation they were probably angry at you for inadvertently breaking the unwritten rules about not jumping your position in the imaginary queues to see things. We got some of that when we pulled up alongside someone to ask what they were looking at.

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^this. it’s the fact that she “claimed” she liked fish

oh god,

just remembered when my erstwhile work colleague Tom entered the gents as I was practicing my smile in the mirror*.

Don’t think either of us were able to look each other in the eye again after that.

*no, I wasn’t naked.


It’s about ten years since I entered the unlocked cubicle that one of my colleagues was taking a dump in. We’re both still here. We didn’t talk about it then and we haven’t talked about it since, but it’s the first thing I think of every time I see him.


I’m sure the feeling is mutual.

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You should both leave the cubicle IMO.


Yes, I’ve no doubt that the “no getting out” rule contribluted to their probable impotent rage at me. I thought I was rather clever at evading this rule via the sunroof. I was in more danger from the vehicle itself as I wasn’t wearing a seatbelt etc.

The coach was coming in the opposite direction but its funny you mention the queueing thing. We were very careful about respecting this after an incident near the begining of our trip. We overtook a stationary car that didn’t seem to be near any animals. AS we passed it it became apparent that the driver was about to take a photograph, with a very sophisticated looking camera lense, of a snake that was on the road right next to the car. My dad drove over said snake.


I was leaving the loos in a bar somewhere - might have been Strongrooms in Shoreditch - and there’s a guy walking towards me and we do the classic stepping from side to side to get out of each others way, but it goes on for an awkwardly long time. I look down and think “Weird. He’s got the same trainers on as me”… Ah. It’s a mirror.

Some bloke behind me just looked at me like I was insane.


I was that arsehole that (accidentally) skips a long queue of traffic and merges in at the last possible point yesterday. Think that’s going to haunt me for a while. I could feel 50 people behind me thinking “what an utter, utter prick”.

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Do they not get told to say stuff like this sometimes to make you feel good about your purchase?

only option after that mishap really innit

As opposed to “You sure you want to be frittering away your child’s education fund on this shit?”.

You’d have to be pretty unlucky to get nabbed by a lion poking your head out of a sun roof. Given that they’ll happily drive you around in open-sided jeeps it would seem a bit illogical to complain.

You’ve just made me all nostalgic for the sound of dung beetles and giant land snails crunching under the car wheels…

pretty sure my local hipster beer shop do that

they always say something like “that’s an awesome selection of beer you have there”. Think they say that to all the middle aged men with too much disposable income


I’ve had a few weird comments. Worst one was when I was 19, in Sainos locs buying Kleenex Mansize tissues and not much else. The attrative lass at the til, said “mansize?” with a coy smile as she scanned them. I was uttlerly mortified. Literally could not say anything in response.



“They’re for my penis”


another missed shop assistant boning

Only thing in my head was “H-how do you know…?” Was not going to give the whole game away saying that