Tomorrow's challenge: Eating a plum as quietly as you can


You will need

• a plum
• a laptop or computer with a microphone. Or of course your phone

Having acquired the plum, and finding yourself some privacy if needs be, you will sit/stand within usual work/leisure range of the device, go to vocaroo, and attempt to eat a plum making as little noise as is humanly possible. Post the result on here.

There is only one judge, which is me. The winner will receive additional plums, which i will buy for them.


I don’t like plums tho


i will allow an apricot as a substitute here.(although i will increase the volume of all apricottal submissions + 10% because they are by nature a quieter fruit)


I don’t like plums or apricots




what kind of sicko wants to hear people’s eating noises?


Bonus points if people can hear ‘yanny’ (or ‘laurel’, if they’re old) in the sounds you make.


ah that’s fine thought because there’s an age limit on the competition so anyone younger than a toddler can’t compete anyway


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ASMR weirdos


hey man there are many types of ASMR weirdo


Thank god


you’re welcome, son





plum ones


Young, dumb and full of plum


I won’t be doing this. Sorry.


i think you will buddy


I remember a T-shirt advertised in the back of Viz that said

If I told ya
That I loved ya
Would ya
Suck my plums

No pun, no nothing really.