Types of people at every school

Something like The Worldwide Message Tribe (i.e. evangelical Christians doing assemblies)


Our person who lolllypops stored their aforementioned giant sweet replica in the lobby of the school, so +1

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Teacher who is very old and technically retired but for some reason seems to still be milling around, nobody questions it.


Teacherspotters. Standing by the main doors with their notebooks.

Yeah we had one of those. Took an overly keen interest in any promising cricketers and drank neat brandy from a tango can. Quite sad looking back

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Noncey PE teacher



Student who’s weirdly obsessed with impressing and trying to befriend one teacher


Had one that had a clock made out of a Marillion vinyl.

the kid that can get you anything (mainly amiga games)


Is there always a kid with a briefcase? I know that sounds like one of those cliche jokes that everybody makes but we genuinely did have a kid who brought a briefcase for a while.

(Obviously he got teased mercilessly for it and then stopped bringing it which, as a fully grown adult, I recognise is a sad thing for a kid that just really liked the idea of using a briefcase. If my kid thought briefcases were cool I’d want him to live in a world where hell yeah he could use a briefcase if he wanted to, no drama)


Actually this is mean-spirited

Kid in a slightly faded school uniform.

Kid who wore joggers instead of regulation school trousers.

Kid who went to America for summer holidays.


There is in the inbetweeners?

Kid who is shit hot at drawing but insists they’re not good at drawing when anybody points it out

Kid who is shit hot at sport and insists everyone knows about it

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Kid whose main personality trait was never doing their homework or revising, but still (smugly) doing very well academically


:wave: it me (tbh all the goths in my school were like this)


I made a concerted effort to avoid this programme as I get a bit wierded out by shows that are about kids but where it’s just a load of people in their mid 20’s wearing school uniforms.

It’s not that I would rather see a comedy show acted out by real kids, I just can’t look past it when it’s clearly a load of adults pretending to be children.

See also, Derry Girls.

I was that person at uni. originally I wasn’t smug about it, but I upset my extremely academic housemate so much by doing better than her on an essay that I wrote last minute that I sort of leaned into it as a defence mechanism