Unacceptable behaviour

Some delivery fuck rang my doorbell and then (in what must have been one fluid motion) started hammering on the door. Fuck you, pal!

Get anything nice?

Lego calendar?

I’ve been expecting two things in the post, neither of them have come. This is also unacceptable.

I do this quite regularly, not aggressively, but still. Sorry Lonzo.

Yeh, he delivered a Lego advent calendar. Got a problem with that?

Interested to know the positioning of the doorbell here if possible to know whether it would be possible to gain the velocity required to “hammer” on the door post-ring in “one fluid motion”

Not at all and I don’t appreciate your accusatory tone.

He’d probably already rung twice.


That’s better than ringing the doorbell, posting through a ‘you were out’ card and running back down the path in one fluid motion, which seems to be the tactic of some of the Royal Mail postmen near me.


I think I made it to the door within six seconds. I think you should wait at least 15 before adding a knock. And 60 before adding a frantic hammering.

My neighbour came round yesterday to drop off a parcel he’d had for me for weeks. I’d just sent an email complaining that it never arrived, because the postie didn’t put a slip through the door.

Unacceptable behaviour.

You’re expecting a 60 second wait!? Fucking hell, who do you think you are?


does he have two hands maybe?

I usually do a jaunty knock, tap tap-de-tap, tap tap
But yeah more for me than anyone else

Who, Balonz?

Did @Antpocalypsenow get his battery Anker thing finally?

I am 6’ the doorbell comes up to my collar bone. It is placed about 3" to the right of the door (put it up myself).

I heard the most unbelievable banging on the door the other day. absolutely shit myself. ran upstairs and hid my weed and what have you, thinking it was the pigs.

turned out it was the washing machine, going mental on a cycle I’d never used before

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My old man always runs and hides his weed (usually in a pipe) in the fucking microwave of all places when he panics