Unusual injuries you have sustained and/or unusual compliments you have received

I had to spend an hour in the minor injuries unit last week because part of the foam earbud on my headphones broke off and lodged itself deep in my ear. tried various pharmacists and hearing centres but only the hospital had the right kit to get it out.

anyway, I had a very chipper doctor who was extremely - possibly too - complimentary about the insides of my ears. he described them variously as “lovely”, “perfect” and “very clean”, he said my eardrum in particular was “perfect; very shiny” and whilst he told me off for using cotton buds he said that I was “clearly doing an excellent job”.

have you ever sustained any unusual injuries and/or received any unusual compliments?

be safe out there everyone - and don’t trust memory foam headphones.

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I got my jaw dislocated by a particularly good save at fives once. That was shit. Sucked the bad ass.

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Fell off my bike onto barbed wire when I was young. Got a big scar on my right arm

Twisted my knee trying to get on my bike while drunk and smuggling kronenburg bottles in my pocket. Told the doctor it was a football injury and he didn’t believe me.

I have also split my head open twice, once a kid at school dropped a brick on my head and once was playing football again. No compliments on the inside of my head, apparently.

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Stapled my thumb making an in-proportion scaled-down paper skeleton of myself in Year 3. Still got the scar.

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I had my 2 front teeth smashed out on the concrete scrapping, which I’m not proud of, but I must admit the day or so before I had them fixed it was fairly amusing having these stumps in my mouth.
Apologies this is kind of graphic.

christ, broken or dislocated jaws look terrifying.

that’s reminded me of the time I broke my mate’s arm with the power of my penalty. he had previously broken my arm when he tripped me over in a tackle. absolute bloodbath of a friendship.

I’m also going to allow unusual injuries you’ve inflicted on someone (accidentally, please)

My fear was the need for surgery and/or a wire. Anyway, I didn’t get them, and a decade later was told that I should have as my teeth have not e set properly since.

Also, like a dick, I refused pain meds when they reset it. Haaaaaaaaa fuck

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In a DT lesson at school I was stupidly trying to prise two pieces of glued wood apart, with a craft knife. Slipped. Stabbed myself through the palm of my hand. The teacher had to rush me to hospital to have it stitched. I bled all over the inside of his car.

Badly sprained my wrist playing the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles arcade game.

Tripped over my bike while changing the inner tube. Broke my arm.

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This one time, while working in Carmarthenshire regenerating footpaths - clearing decades of bramble growth, building stiles, bridges etc, we were taking out an old stile. For some reason I was bashing the stile with the claw end of a hammer, and one such bash glanced off the rather sorry looking stile straight into my right shin. Somehow it didn’t seem to damage the bone, but I’ve had a claw mark in my leg ever since.

I got a cat hair wedged in what felt like the back of my eye. Was told to go to a&e and felt foolish but they flushed it out and sorted me out. It was so scratchy and sore

Oh yeah an unusual but welcome compliment is that i have very moist eyes, maybe because i cry a lot idk but it is good to know as it means that as a daily contact lens wearer, my eyes are not oxygen starved and are healthy

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This was at the eye hospital btw not just an unsolicited comment

excellent (sort of). more unusual compliments please people

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I’ve got a dent in the top of my head from where I tried to sit on a wall while waiting for a taxi after a night in RG1’s in March 2001. On my side, the wall was normal sitting height. For some reason, I tried to vigorously push myself up to sit on it, but ai misjudged the push and went flying over the wall headfirst, where there was a six foot drop into a brick floor. My “mate” found it hilarious. Apparently I was out cold for a while. There was blood all over the place. Soon after, the taxi arrived and for some reason I went home rather than to hospital. Smdh.

Had some gnarly bollock pain (just the one). Went to the doctor. They inspected the well-behaved one first and muttered “very nice…err, HEALTHY”

So I’ve got one very nice bollock.

Sawed through the tip of my little finger few weeks ago. Was Saturday evening so wasn’t gonna go to A&E so patted it back into place and think it’s fine apart from having no feeling in the tip.