"Wait a minute, this isn't Albatross!" (Awful riddles thread)


scuba instructor




How little you’ve lived.

Who always wants to kill you?





No one wants to kill me. I’m lovely.


The butler?


Of course not.

Much more obvious.


His wife?





So how did she engineer his death?

Bear in mind, it’s ridiculous.




she filled his gas mask with poisonous gas


She swapped the gas for the carbon monoxide fire extinguisher and then used dry ice outside the window to scare him into using his gas mask?


Something like that yes, or the cylinder he was carrying.




Actually it’s carbon dioxide isn’t it? ANYWAY THE POINT IS IT WOULD KILL HIM.


Hurry up and work out where he found himself when he decided he needed to use his breathing apparatus.

Surrounded by panes.

Bear in mind I haven’t got all fucking day.


(I have.)


It provides a motive.

In this set of cases people will kill their partners/friends/family members at the drop of a hat as long as there’s a few quid involved.


The shower?