Wednesday Morning poisoned-by-a-Tory-Politician-in-your-aunt's-fantasy thread

My sister-in-law posted this to FB today

How is everyone? Hopefully no one has actually been poisoned by a dildo, today or indeed any day.

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I once worked with someone whose mum wrote (and had published) a novel that included an extremely explicit sex scene involving the character that was a blatant copy of my colleague, i.e. her daughter.



Morning, working in the Bradford office, not step foot in there for 5 years so will be slightly weird, hopefully no one talks to me.

Getting picked up at half 6, brother went in the bathroom at 5:57 and is not looking like he will be out any time soon.

Ooh, did he get out in time for you to use the bathroom at all?

Got a creak in my neck :sob:

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I thought Tuesday night’s sleep was bad, but no, last night’s was worse.

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What’s the cause? Or are you just having bad nights?

Can you see it yet?


I’m pretty, pretty zombified today. Got my bedroom cooler than the previous night but it clearly wasn’t enough.

The heat. Our house is actually not too bad (we rarely need the windows open at night), but the past few nights have been very warm.

Had to get up to go into work early this morning, so of course the trains are all in a complete mess (derailment outside Cardiff Central). Might as well have stayed in bed. Fucks sake.

Edit: amazingly that little winge actually worked. We’re on the move.


Oh shit yeah, my mum was complaining about that.

You should do this!

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Poisoned by a dildo
I know, I know
It’s serious


Got so much to do in the next 3 weeks, feeling a bit sick at the prospect of it all. Of course I’m doing none of it and just panicking instead.

Off to feed Bernie then to buy some sugar as we’ve such a haul of nassive raspberries so ita jam making day. Of course I cleared out all my empty jars thinking I’d never use them just last week, of course I did.




I went on a date last night and it was amazing and I feel very happy but beyond tired.

Got a meeting at the end of today to discuss my department’s strategy that I’ve supposed to be working on the whole week (which is why I’ve been posting here lately) which I am massively not ready for. I will have to use all of my bluffing powers, basically at this point right now.

First volleyball since my finger break this evening, still a bit worried about my finger so gonna put the splint back on for it.


Back to work after a week and a half off :frowning:

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So glad it’s going well!