I’m sorry but this has made me laugh so much.
Also it just goes to show how everyone does that joke. If someone I know has spoken or bumped into a stranger once, i’ll always be like “there’s your mate”.
A woman with huge fake breasts and a tiny top plonked herself right opposite my bf in yoga once and it was tits in his face the whole time so every time we go to yoga and she’s there, i’ll say “oh your girlfriend is here”