What were the other 45 ways to leave your lover?

Paul Simon got things rolling, but only gave us 5 examples. Does anyone know of the other 45?

Hop on the tram, Sam
Fake your own death, Beth
Move onto Devon, Stephan

Change the key, ste


dunno but there’s only 15 ways to leave your man

Bang her sis, Chris

Drop em off at the ponds, Balonz


Go live in a cave, Dave

Shave your head, Ed.


I just googled the lyrics to Plus Ones by Okkervil River. There’s loads of them.

That guy REALLY likes words.

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Something about cousins

Break my gnome, Noam.

Watch Robin Hood, Jude

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Hope you kept the receipt from the florist, Boris.

Get addicted to porn, sean

Get the fuck out of the freezer, Theresa

Troll the forum, goram

guardian headline if they were any good

Unsolicited dick pic, Rick

It’s you I’m not havin’, Gavin.

Give us back your key, Lee