what's in your junk emails?

[iamwiggy]

pasional

[avocado]

[Epimer]

Could they not have gone for PEN15-inch for fuck’s sake. Where’s the artistry.

[avocado]

I have quite a lot of these, let me know if anyone wants them forwarded on for the African elongation secret xx

[SenorDingDong]

I got a spam phone call yesterday and it was a recorded message telling my my national insurance number was being shut down because of financial irregularities (?) and I had “the legal troubles”. It asked me to press 1 for more information, and it was difficult because I really did want more information.

[foppyish]

Always my favourite

[froglet]

I don’t get much spam in my main email account, but my old one gets loads. Someone called Mary had it before me and it was already getting a lot of spam as soon as i set it up. I don’t know why i didn’t choose another one at the time as it’s free. Sometimes the spam is still addressed to Mary even though she hasn’t had the account since 2002 at the latest.

[Epimer]

@SenorDingDong

and I had “the legal troubles”.

That’s what I say when I’ve got anxiety bumwee before a hearing

[Squandered]

This thread prompted me to check my junk for a hilarious email to share with my friends on drownedinsound but actually I had a pitch acceptance in there! I hope it’s not a scam

[Im_On_Safari]

A land of opportunity

[hesastopsiiiiign]

Just rubbish from conmen

[Unlucky]

“Loads” of notifications from this forum

[Epimer]

@Unlucky turn them off then

[Unlucky]

Cba

[Unlucky]

Have just found the vegbox invoice thing which i thought theyd just stopped sending.

[RenOrStimpy]

Disappointingly there is NOTHING related to my lack of sexual prowess or tiny penis.

I have won a lot of Dysons though.

[shrewbie]

[Epimer]

Nominative determinism at work there

[Elights]

I got one the other day via FB that literally said “I am a prostitute and I will fuck you well for cash”. Usually it’s a bit more subtle than that.

[Elights]

Then there’s this, which manages to be offensive on almost every conceivable level. Multiple layers of racism, deeply nsfw AND an insinuation that my penis is unsatisfying. Blurred, obv - be warned.