What's your best and worst physical features


say two each, max

best - incredible eyes and still relatively high cheekbones

worst - ears poke out a bit and small penis


Lovely eyes, great legs
Shit head, too short


Basically average height and weight so can buy clothes without worrying
Basically put together in the dark so I look like a pound-shop Nice Cage (oh and I’m going bald, stupid hair)


how short is short, bud?


5’7" mate, think it’s underrated in terms of things that have a tangibly negative effect on a person’s life.


man, I’d say you’re just on the cusp of being pathetically short. you’re fine, dude. reckon average is 5’8" for adult man

you probably have a great penis, too


Best things:
I’m 6’4
My beard isn’t looking bad these days

Worst things:
General lack of body tone (though still within healthy BMI)
Injury-prone knees


++ Decent legs, well hung

– Nose is a bit crooked, and I’m really pale


Fucking great cock mate, that’s for sure.

(5’10" is national average but thanks for your kind, reassuring words)



  • Upper back/shoulder region
  • Cute dimples when I smile


  • Side-profile of my head exposes a weak chin which is well-hidden from the front
  • Toes have become pretty gnarly from being mashed into tight climbing shoes so often


5’10" is average!!?? mine’s about 7 inches, tops


This is a good, solid gag. Nice one.


:heavy_plus_sign: quite tall
:heavy_plus_sign: thick head of hair, unlikely to go bald

:heavy_minus_sign: eyes, massively short sighted and colour blind
:heavy_minus_sign: hands go a bit eczema-y if i get stressed out. they’re a bit eczema-y at the moment.


That’s what she said!


Best: height, broad shoulders/back, great eyes, grey hair sides.

Worst: fatness, small hands, sticky out ears.

  • eyes
    (I have been complemented on both of these things multiple times so it must be true I guess)
  • bald
    -very skinny wrists and fingers


2 each, max. please narrow it down


++ Tall enough (could be taller though)
++ Decent arse

– Constantly red/flushed skin
– Squinty eye
– Big crooked nose
– shit hairline
– body hair
– tooth gap
– fat


Best: slim neck, attractive body shape
Worst: noisy innards, flimsy bridge leading to relatively poor sustain