When was the last time you touched a colleague's mouse?

I think we might be talking a couple of years here!!!

probably Friday when I was showing Julie something

Can I shock you - I never use mices

If I’m at home I just use the touchpad on my laptop - if I’m in the office with access to a bigger screen I still just use the laptop keyboard and track pad thing. Proper keyboards feel odd to me now, and mice are just full of dead skin and bogies

I went to another office the other month and at a bank of four desks three people had two monitors and keyboard etc. One had nothing and I mean nothing on his desk other than a laptop. This was his permanent desk (in fact he was the boss of the team). I was forced to pick up the laptop and smash it over his head. I had been left with no choice.

was he wearing a black polo neck?

I think a short sleeved shirt.

Julie was fucking you over with the drinks right? That Julie?

No, that wasn’t Julie. Julie would never do that to me.
She did say the other week that she thought I was 40 (I am 33) which is quite frankly outrageous and has slightly tarnished our relationship I fear. Fucking 40!

We all hotdesk at this gaff, meaning that in theory no one owns any work property.

That said, people definitely have their favourite desks - if hotdesking was actually a secret ploy to encourage people to get in earlier and earlier to nab their preferred spot then it’s worked like a charm. Not on me obviously, I continue to rock up at half nine and end up stuck on the one spare desk with the actuaries or something.

Except today, when freakishly I got in for half eight and had my veritable walk of the place. Grabbed the corner desk by the window - best for both natural light and clandestine DiSing. In your face Cognos guy who usually sits here!!! He looked fairly miffed when he arrived five minutes later and found me sat there. Had left his pen on the desk too, as though clear desk policy means absolutely fuck all to him.

Tl:dr? Just touched a ‘claimed’ mouse to reply to this thread…

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she recalled this story in front of her colleague yesterday and her colleague laughed which I took to mean I look nowhere near 40 and look about 25

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Last week I asked a seven year old girl how old I was and she guessed at 21. Which is funny as I am at least five years older than that.

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Can you sit at the MD’s desk?

I get in first usually so this would suit me down to the ground.

double bad as people always underestimate ages to be polite

are you getting enough sleep? Maybe you need to spruce up your wardrobe?

The CEO? Possibly - she’s rarely ever here (in fact, just last week rather disappointingly I saw a pic on Boris Johnson’s Twitter of her opening a new private hospital in Chile with him). That said, her PA is extremely fearsome and may chase me off :scream: :scream: :scream_cat:

I think it’s because I’ve been such an unbelievable font of knowledge to her and her team for the past 4 years that she can’t believe I’m so young.

Maybe I need to get some red trousers and wear whatever Justin Bieber wears nowadays for dress down fridays?

How old is Julie (roughly) ?

I’m guessing 45 to 50 (just for fun)

Looking to get set up? Do it @Im_On_Safari

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she’s 45. Which makes this even more ridiculous! I’m not 5 years younger than her, this is bullshit Julie!

that wasn’t my intention - but she is safely in my age range