Six, mate, yeah, not five.
DarwinDude (safehands goalie)
prof-k (Tony Adams-style centre-half)
bugduv (Pirlo role)
nestor (right flank, drop-of-the-shoulder Chrissy Waddle type)
andyvine (left wing pinging 'em in)
Antpocalypsenow (goalhanger)
3 Likes
yeah man, kicking the ball, scoring a point, all that
10 Likes
He’s the thinker of the team. Great left peg, though.
2 Likes
chucked a can of fosters at someone last time i played football. they wanted me to hit the ball with my head! ridiculous game
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I very much see Viney as a cross between a late 1970s John Robertson and a young Cristiano Ronaldo.
Nestor’s more of a late era Gordon Strachan.
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No bugle until after we seal Le Tournoi.
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all the big lads (me, profk, steved, imonsafari and deadonthestairs) plus someone small like tone to be the kevin phillips to our collective niall quinns
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The press are sayin’ ‘oh, do they lack pace at the back?’ and i’m saying ‘fucking right we do, we’re giving folk what they want’. Some weeks we’ll look like Yashin, Nadal and Makelele, other weeks Burridge, Boumsong and Kleberson, but win, lose or draw people will have something to talk about on a Monday morning, and that’s what it’s all about.
7 Likes
Used to be a keeper and central defender, so good/poor choice
1 Like
Definitely not wilykit. I met the lad for the first time when I invited him down to Chorlton Baths as we were down a player and were desperate.
Never have I seen such a lack of correlation between someone’s interest in football and ability at playing!
Good lad otherwise, like.
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I’ve got sympathy for him. A mate once invited me to his work 5-a-side at the last minute. I ran rings around him on the street but shat my pants. Started on the right wing, got moved to the back, then put in net, then subbed off without a replacement. The winning goal scored by my mate, past me. This lad was fucking useless, skinned him daily for years, but turned into Ali Daia on the big stage. Dinked one over me like Garrincha, ffs.
@ma0sm in goals, reflexes of a cat
@marckee at the back, ensuring tactical rigidity
@SenorDingDong as box-to-box dynamo, until tiring approximately 15 minutes in then playing the static Prosinecki role
@anon89873996 on the wing, capable of a moment of wonder to unlock the opposition defence
@lastdino mainly to model the new kit each season
@anon50098204 up front - the man literally won’t stop scoring
4 Likes
I would not have expected to be picked in this thread, I feel oddly touched to be chosen, on such a solid team too 
Coincidentally, I always used to play winger if we were doing football in PE lessons (read: everyone else just chased after the ball, while I used the excuse of creating an option out wide to not have to do very much, I like to think the teacher appreciated my tactical sense though).
3 Likes
POTY
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you’re already in the team playing the makelele role, i’m afraid.
2 Likes
we’re totally fucked then.
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myself, ruffers, profk, aggpass, rich-t and Lo-pan
we’d be shite on the pitch but the patter would be phenomenal