words/phrases you've started using a lot more often, for no particular reason

  • fair play
  • “that’s how they get you!”

Regardless of whether it is appopriate or relevant

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See this

Everything in our house is now “x-a tha y”. Started out as “toucha tha bum” but is now “slaya tha monster” or “cooka tha dinner”

Doesn’t work fuck off bye

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That’s what she said

Because I’m binging the US Office right now

‘for sure’

did a zoom/podcast thing the other day and had to edit out myself saying it 897 times

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Started saying “Shabba” recently for some reason.

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Not a word or phrase but recently realised how much i say ‘erm’ on work calls, like a footballer getting interviewed.

when you think about it

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The cleaner from my old pub in Bath (tasmanian devil tattoo on the back of his head, been in prison a lot) ends all his Facebook posts with ‘shabba’. Has made updates on the recent messy breakup of his marriage slightly hilarious.

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‘X found dead’ to indicate that something would shock/offend someone, i.e. if there was a yougov poll saying the British public thought Antony Costa was the best member of Blue, you could say “Pervo found dead” because it would be such a strong rejection of my personal philosophy that Lee Ryan is a national treasure and Antony Costa is the worst member of Blue. Very tasteless but addictive once you start saying it and you’d be surprised how frequently it can be used.

Saying a noun + ‘up bum’ to indicate displeasure, dismissal or disinterest, i.e. Antony Costa up bum. If you want to feel jazzy it’s ‘up bum no babies’. I’ve also started expressing things in the most simplified way.

Altogether, my typical mode of speech with my closest friends reads something like: Lee Ryan best member of Blue, Simon Webbe found dead. Antony Costa up bum.

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This must be how Shakespeare felt when he reinvented the English language: proud and moderately hysterical at own genius.

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‘don’t know nothing’ and other similarly constructed phrases. I tend to pick bits and pieces up wherever I live and this is an interesting reversion to how I would have spoke growing up in england. It’s strange because no one I hang out with in the US would talk like this but I guess its in the air

actually apart from found dead, “Here we… Here we… Here we fucking go!!!” is probably the thing I say most often

no actually I say “correct” instead of yes pretty much all the time

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“Never in my puff” because the first time my wife heard it in her puff she gave me a look like I had gone totally mad