Work's Christmas Joke Thread

As part of my workplace’s festive ‘12 days of ORGANISED FUN’ they’re having a Christmas Joke competition which are all being sent around by email.

I’m going to post some examples here as and when they come in and if you like, you’re welcome to pale by comparison.

Let’s start with this zinger from ‘Jonesy’

Why doesn’t the North Pole import goods?

Because it’s elf-sufficient

4 Likes

:rofl::joy::rofl::joy:Jonesy you son of a gun! Have a raise.

5 Likes

‘Mazzzz’ seems to have lost the plot a little if I’m honest.

What can you do with a Spaceman?

Park in it

1 Like

It’s extremely sparsely populated and hence has no use for a mercantile economy.

1 Like

Whos the most horrible reindeer?

Rude-Adolf

HAHAHAHAHAHA brilliant.

1 Like

Not even “park in it, man”?!

Fired.

8 Likes

Kinda related, but there was an email sent round telling everyone not to be dicks with desk decorations (fire hazards, covering other people’s desks, etc. thrilling stuff) but they wouldn’t go with my suggested headline: Tis the season to be jolly… deck the halls in accordance with corporate decoration policy

Cowards. I’m wasted here.

13 Likes

Only what the spaceman consents to.

3 Likes

Blitzen. It’s short for “Blitzkrieger”

Bit early to be drinking for me, but you do you.

Good one.

Why was the snowman rummaging in the bag of carrots?

He was picking his nose HAHAHA

5 Likes

Thought his name was Justin

7 Likes

He was trying to find an appropriately sized carrot for his dinner, to match the amounts of other vegetables.

They’re flooding in now… This one from ‘Christo Chrimbo’.

What kind of cars do elves like to drive?

A Toy-ota!

Compact ones, due to their short stature.

2 Likes

If they’re half-elves, they prefer a hybrid.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Fuck off

1 Like

Why was Jesus caning the protein shakes?

he was trying to improve his Christ Mass

8 Likes

Been working on something to do with Huel-y Water for a few minutes now but I don’t think it’s going to work.

1 Like

‘Jonesy’ is banging them out.

Who is the king of Santa’s rock and roll helpers?

Elfis