Worst team building exercises


#1

The first one I did here was great: we went to a cookery school and made a nice dinner while getting mashed on unlimited free booze. Brilliant.

But it’s looking increasingly likely that this week’s one is going to be a fucking ceilidh after a dinner. Fuck. That. I’m going to bring a note from my mum saying I can’t participate due to my bad knees.


#2

Ceilidhs are excellent you penoid. Man up and enjoy it.

Have done the cookery school thing a few times before. Great fun, especially when the big bosses spent all their time outside on their phones and didn’t put the panna cotta in the fridge in time then got a telling off by the chef.


#3

#4

I don’t enjoy dancing. It makes me feel very self-conscious. Doubly so in front of colleagues. Nightmare fuel.


#5

Yeah but the beauty of ceilidhs is that you can throw yourself around without having to worry about rhythm or coordination. And everyone else is too busy trying not to fall over to even look at anyone else.


#6

Seems like the opposite of a team building exercise to me. Separate your workforce into a bunch of showoffs and a bunch of resentful wallflowers and watch the team not build.

You have my sympathies. Tell them to shove it up their arses.


#7

ceilidhs are a complete exception

they tell you all the moves you’re supposed to do!


#8

I’d call in sick for that. Genuinely.


#9

I’m going to be missing the Netrunner World Championship stream for this shit too, ffs!


#10

Still.


#11

If I was missing something in order to do this then I would 100% bail from it.


#12

Unfortunately it’s at some country hotel in Balonz’s neck of the woods, i.e. the arse end of nowhere, so conveniently ducking out won’t be easy.

Definitely going to use the knee excuse if I’m right, though.


#13

Redundancies


#14

propose a 10 hour game of cards instead, i’m sure they’ll love that.


#15

Yeah gotta get some kind of sickness excuse in for this one mate. No other way out.


#16

Already got that stuff packed, obviously.


#17

Alright. Going to go gorge myself on cheese and double cream. Desperate times etc.

If I don’t make it, tell my girlfriend to remember to put the bins out tonight.


#18

There was a team activity at the last place I worked where teaching staff prepared some of the buffet items for lunch. It was very clear which salad had been made by real caterers and which had been made by Computing lecturers who’d only recently been made aware of salad.


#19

I would like to echo this post.

I have been to three ceilidhs, and I very much enjoyed each one. I am genuinely the worst and most self concious dancer on the planet, too.

Fuck doing one for a work team building exercise though, granted.


#20

Suspicions confirmed.

Fuck off, everything.