#1

In your work email signature (sorry for those not on work emailbook), you have to put ā€œIā€™m a street walkinā€™ cheetah with a heart full of napalmā€ until further notice - presumably your boss noticing. None of this white font on white background shite either, at most you can match it to the existing font.

  • Look Iā€™m sorry but wild animals arenā€™t a part of the brand identity that our amazing marketing team spent months putting together, and Iā€™m simply not going to make a mockery of all of Jimothy and Bethaniaā€™s hard work
  • squealing guitar lick

0 voters

#2

Really like the idea of Iggy Pop reading this one and going ā€œfucking FINALLY. Right lads Iā€™m off, get Lamacq in to cover or something, not my problem. Tatty bye.ā€

3 Likes
#3

Not at work today but anyway, I send about 2 work emails a week to booze suppliers and I really doubt theyā€™d notice. Might even start each one with ā€˜look out honey, cause Iā€™m using technology, ainā€™t got time to make no apologyā€™.

3 Likes
#4

I would but I work for a mental health charity and I wouldnā€™t want to give our clients the wrong idea. Iā€™ll survive.

#5

Iā€™m not in work today but Iā€™m still up for this.

1 Like
#6

I doubt theyā€™d even complain - unless I didnā€™t also include a Welsh translation.

#7

What is the Welsh for ā€œcheetahā€ anyway? Iā€™ve always wanted to know.

#8

Itā€™s not very local government to be honest. Though it could be quite fun to see how long it took someone to confront me on it.

#9

Just tell them theyā€™re being no fun.

#10

Popty-cheet

4 Likes
#11

Dwiā€™n cheetah cerdded ar y stryd gyda chalon yn llawn o napalm

Just Cheetah apparently. Disappointing.

1 Like
#12

how about this

I was off work sick yesterday, had to go to the doctors this morning to get a backdated sicknote, because of some weird law in CZ they had to sign me off today too, so Iā€™m going home to bed.

Fucking LOVE IT

1 Like
#13

Jokeā€™s on you, Iā€™m already at home as a result of my no-coffee-agreement, suckas

#14

Your pretty face is going to hell

#15

So you arenā€™t gonna gimme danger, ya little stranger?

#16

That would contravene workplace health and safety regulations so no.

#17

Well youā€™re just No Fun

#18

have you ever seen an email signature that didnā€™t make the sender look like a bell end

  • no
  • yes, once

0 voters

#19

Our corporate one is fine, except itā€™s got all the social media links in it. Who the fuck wants to follow a chemical sustainable technology companyā€™s Instagram account ffs.

#20

Hey. HEY.