You know what irritates me?

When theres a story made out of someone returning a library book after 30-40 years. You forgot to take a book back, fucking great. I forget things all the time.

It always says like “Oh the fine would’ve been £4,300 but the library has decided to let them off”. Fine the forgetful cunts, make an example out of them.

Fuck off.


@plasticniki should really stop these people flouting the library laws like this. Set up some sort of fines taskforce


We don’t do fines here

Would love it if they did get fined. Walking in with the book, expecting a laugh with the librarian and maybe a photo and story in the local paper, then bang, you’re selling the motor to pay off the fine.


Fines should be capped at the retail price of the book, tbh.

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And they don’t pay it, and the closure of the library is blamed on funding shortages arising from the non-payment of the fine.

And they’re hounded out of town by the locals.


Thinly-veiled “I lost £4,300 to Cambridgeshire County Council”


Hang the prick

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Throw the book at him.



Read him The Riot Act.

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Brings back traumatic memories of the 24 hour university library

50p per hour overdue or summat :fearful:

Crack his spine!

Give him a long sentence


There used to be 4 hour loans at our library. Though I think you could game it a little by renting something out a few minutes before closing time on a Friday *rollsafe.jpg*

Nah, loss of potential earnings isn’t it. Throw the book at them, literally and figuratively. (ah shit I see marckee got there first on that one)

This is reminding me of a hell of a time at uni one summer. Car got broken into on the last day at uni and all my housemates fucked off while I had to wait an extra week for the police to locate my car and then get it fixed at the mechanics (which involved adding push button start to a 1997 Vauxhall Corsa like a McDonald’s car park wanker).

Decided to make the most of the time and rent like 15 films from the library. Once my car was fixed I pissed off back to my hometown and left the films in the capable hands of my mate in his third year who was about to leave a week later than me after finishing his degree. He tried to return the films but the fucking library was flooded so he had to take them back to Torquay and he took fucking 3 months before sending them back to my hometown in a massive jiffy bag. Got them back to uni and had to pay £££ before the term had even started ffs.

tl;dr - librarians don’t give a fuck about acts of God.

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Bunch of pricks!